Poker Depression

Not much has gone right lately in the game of poker for me. I've had an absolutely awful February and really have been struggling with how I feel about my game and myself. When I feel like I have everything under control and know I'm playing well, I'll have a day or a few days where I just do unbelievable things. The game of poker is one of the most frustrating things anyone could ever do. The highs and lows are unbelievable. Just one month ago I was on the verge of an excellent start to the year with a great month and a couple nice tournament wins. I have now had very little success and when I've been in great positions late in tournaments, nothing has gone right. The game is so filled with luck that you just can't control anything. The stability of income is just not there when you are a professional and it's tough to deal with on an everyday basis. If you are a tournament player for the majority of the time, you don't really make good money unless you get in the top 3 of a normal tournament or go deep in a big buy in tournament. I haven't had success on a Sunday since probably September. I don't know what's wrong with my game. Emotionally, it's tough and I try not to let it affect me, and for the most part, I don't let it affect my interactions, but it's an ever lingering thing. By doing this, I'm essentially trading off a standard economics major $50k starting salary and experience in a job for a lot of emotional instability, probably around that amount of money if I stick to normal circumstances and a shot at much more. I have the potential of being a millionaire early in life, getting financially comfortable at a very young age and the options of being able to take my financial gain and do something else with it either charitably or as an entrepreneur. In my experiment after college, I have to determine if that's worth it; however, I'm not so certain skill level and knowledge of this game equates to success more than my talents in another field might. It's tough to gauge my skill level even to myself. There is no measuring stick for that. Sure, results will tell you something, and 2 big weekend tournaments along with a big second place finish in a period of 5 months should tell me that I have enough talent for the game, but I haven't seen that translate into anything. I want consistent earnings and success and shots at the big tournaments where I can make a name for myself. I can't just go take shots at huge tournaments if I'm not financially backed, which I don't want to do. I really wonder if I've changed my game when the results weren't there to a dangerous point. I certainly know I'm running worse than expected over the period of time since I've been an official professional, but that really shouldn't matter. I believe in myself and my ability to succeed at anything, but right now, it's been really difficult to understand the game. Bad beats happen to everyone and every successful player, but if they always happen at inopportune times, it's possible to never win. You will lose probably 99.9% of the tournaments you enter or be dissatisfied with the result. If you are successful in final tables 5% of the time, you are probably very good. I'm just struggling right now.