The 27th day.

I warn readers that I've played 26 days of poker straight, and I'll be playing my 21st event today. My mind is in a weird place, but relentless positivity and thoughts of being a champion still pervade. I have been battling a cough for the last three days or so, but if Dirk Nowitzki can play like a sick champion while spanking Lebron James in the NBA Finals, then a little bug isn't going to affect me. It's pretty easy to catch something in that giant Rio petri dish passing around chips that each person has coughed all over.

I arrived about an hour late to the $1k NL Hold 'em today. After losing a key pot early QQ vs AK and KJ, I rallied from just 1400 chips (starting 3k) all the way up to 11k. The key hand of the day came as I held AQ out of the small blind with blinds at 100/200 25 ante. An aggressive player raises the cutoff position and I call out of the small blind. Flop comes A95 two of the same suit. I decide to check raise his 800 bet to 1900. He calls. Turn card is a 4 second suit of spades. Two flush draws are now out. He was the type of player that was literally raising any two cards at this point. I decided to ship in 9075 into the 5200 pot b/c I sort of put him on a draw or a weaker ace and really thought he might call me off. I wanted to push this for value and protect my hand. I thought he'd be more likely to call a shove then two bets in a row. I was pretty confident I had the best hand. If I bet into a better hand then fine, but I just didn't care about controlling the pot. When I pushed my 9075 in I still had a 25 chip on my cards. The dealer incorrectly announced that I was all in and I pointed to my chip a few times but didn't want to say much as the player hadn't acted yet. The player thinks for a while and calls immediately flipping his A4 over for two pair. The dealer says "ok we are all in flip them over." Then they call the floor because I point out that I'm not all in. First floor guy somehow rules it's an assumed all in and I say there is no way I'm going to put that chip in the pot when there is one card to come and I know his hand. Now typically they penalize someone for exposing a hand before the action is over, but I'm glad to see the 2nd floor man decided not to penalize my opponent and ruled I didn't have to bet that chip. The bad news is the river was a 6 and I check folded my cards face down. I'm really fine with the play. My 25 chips and my 28 of diamonds failed to beat AK on the next hand.

The 5k NL Hold 'em event concluded for me on Saturday with a teasing day 3 11th place finish. It was the 3rd biggest event so far this series in terms of prize pool out of the first 40 events. My day 3 began with me pushing A8 of diamonds at 5k/10k blinds 1k ante into the short stack big blind and losing 85k from my 866k. I then immediately raised KK and everyone folded and that about sums up the day. I made a bluff that eventual champion Matt Jarvis made a nice call with J9 on a K Jd Td 9d 2s board. I missed my straight flush draw with A7d and almost moved all in there. Who knows if he calls? The deck put me in a few less than lukewarm situations as well. My AA had the board run out Kh4h4sThJh. I bet on the flop and the turn because I felt like he could still be drawing with a KQ, KJ hand or even have something like nines with a heart. I folded to his river bet. I believe I was right on both decisions, but I'll never know for sure. After the bluff, I won a KQ vs AT all in by hitting a K on the last card. Shortly after, I 3 bet Jarvis again with TT only to see him call in position and flop come out AJ4. After my bet on the flop, the K on the turn made me just give up with my 19 bb stack. He could have been bluffing, I think he probably had me beat at that point. If he didn't, then he just owned my soul. I then moved all in over a raise 5 handed with AQ and the small blind called with 99. The 9 on the flop sealed my fate. It didn't occur to me until later that I shook everyone's hand because I was kind of in a daze at the time. 3 days of poker and all the excitement of achieving my one goal this summer was on hold. Props to my opponents as they deserved to be there getting through that tough field.

Overall, I'm happy with that tournament, I'll learn from it and move on. I made a couple bad plays in the event, but also made some good ones and rallying from just 16,000 chips with blinds at 800/1600 all the way to 11th makes it hard to complain about luck. It was probably the best competition in a tournament I've played to date. Some extremely talented tables played throughout that tournament. At the same time, it's extremely painful to be so close to a huge score and a bracelet again and come up short. The swings in emotions are just mind boggling. I slept extremely well the night before day 3 despite it being the biggest tournament I would ever win if I beat the 20 remaining players. I feel much more mature as a poker player in terms of how I manage my emotions. At the end of the day, it's just a game and you have to have confidence in your ability and reads and play great poker.

I've been having a lot of fun this summer and wouldn't want to be any place in the world but in the biggest poker tournaments in the world. I do miss my girlfriend and family/friends. 27 straight days of poker probably isn't helping my relations to any other human, but I get to take a break and head to Cleveland for July 1-5 where I'll see a lot of great people in my life. I'm super excited for that. Then I'll return for maybe one more event and the Main Event. I'm feeling ready for that after immersing myself in poker this month.

It's 2:21am and somehow I haven't gone to bed yet, but I'll decide how I feel tomorrow and play either the 10k six max NL Hold 'em tournament or the 2500 Omaha Hi/Lo and Stud Hi/Lo 8 or better Limit tournament.

Five Simple Reasons to Regulate Online Poker

#1 To protect players. The government in collaboration w/ players needs to make sure people's money/financial info is safe.

#2 To create business in the United States. New businesses are good. Competition helps players. Jobs are created.

#3 Tax Revenue in US. Needs to be fair to players and cover costs of an efficient regulatory body.

#4 Poker is different from gambling. Gambling is a part of the game as is sometimes the case in strategy games. Poker is a game of skill and needs to be treated different in public policy.

#5 Poker is played by millions... MILLIONS of Americans...Prohibition and resources wasted towards stopping this activity are counterproductive to business and government.

I probably have 10 more good reasons.

Time for Reflection

Post online poker in the US has let me reflect. Let me make the first statement more accurate. The post US online poker world where US players could actually compete in a large enough player pool to matter and create enough value to make it worth it has disappeared. Online poker still goes on in the USA if someone wants to go through the avenues to play. Prohibition never works.

As for my reflection, there has always been a battle in my mind and spirit about what poker has meant to me. Sometimes I think about it more, on long plane and car rides, sometimes I think about it less. I've been consumed by the game at many points in the past 4 years to the point of playing 14-20 day series nearly every day and regularly playing 12-16 hours on a Sunday. That doesn't leave much time to reflect on the big picture. To be away now for almost 3 weeks without a chance to compete is tough. I can say without a doubt that I loved what I was doing. Online poker is a training grounds. It's the best value place to hone skills in many games. I believe the only way to be great is to practice. Online poker lets someone like me who deposited under $1k of my own money initially to work my way up. Along the way, I made enough that I could focus on it full time. Less than 2 months off my largest cash win (not online), my training grounds are gone. The repetition that online poker gives me is no more. I now must travel away from the comfort of my home, live in and around casinos, risk more of my money for less value, and most importantly, put a shirt on to go to work.

Practice is essential for the World Series of Poker coming up from June 1-July 20. Of the over 50 events, there are many different games and buy in levels not just the most popular No Limit Hold 'em. You can't play these games regularly aside from a few venues and very rarely in a tournament of a size that matters. This hurts US players against our competition from non-US players that continue to improve at this very moment through experience.

At this point, most online player's careers earning a living doing something they loved online. While nothing changes the fact that online poker probably won't be available to us, we are all still going to Vegas to play in the most meaningful events for poker players. Events that allow us to win a coveted World Series of Poker bracelet. A brand that was built from the inside out of America that should be the biggest brand in poker now pales in comparison to other international poker growth because of a law that was not once discussed by our "representatives." Many players win their way into the main event for $1-$1000 online and can compete for upwards of $7 million. That is now impossible for the majority of US players and will hurt attendance.

After the World Series of Poker, some of us will win and some of us will lose. We will all have to make a decision. At that point, I will have to decide if I want to leave the country to be able to play online and evaluate what that means I'm giving up in the US. These are not light life decisions and require the maturity of years to probably make correctly. Since I already know that the government doesn't believe we are mature enough to handle our own money against other players in an online poker game, I'm sure they will offer us assistance in making our decision.

I've read other blogs where most players talk about a gaping 5 year hole in their resume, but I see this as hopeless talk. I'll list below a few of the things I've learned.

I've learned to able to ignore money to make a profitable mathematical decision.
I've learned to control unwanted negative emotions.
I've learned to manage money.
I've learned to understand and respect the results that come with luck.
I've learned I don't feel right if I don't give something back when people are in need.
I've learned inside of me, I have the ability to become a champion and compete at the highest level.
I've learned how to not live outside of my means.
I've learned about human nature in pressure situations.
I've learned a lot about different cultures and their players.
I've learned how to take a risk.
I've learned how to survive out of the comfort zone of a steady job and income.
I've learned how to objectively examine and review plays in poker.
I've learned the value of hard work (but I was actually taught this my entire life, nothing changed in poker)
I've learned there are always people in life cheering for you and always people rooting against you. The people rooting against you are louder than the people cheering for you.


"Stay far from timid, only make moves when your hearts in it, and live the phrase sky's the limit."

The Hangover

It's what you can call the week after your most exciting moment in your career. I remember it after June 2010 and the infamous KK vs AK hand. (forgot the hand write-up is wrong on pre-flop action). While that wasn't yet the final table it was the closest to the biggest goal I have, a WSOP bracelet. The EPT championship would have easily been just a hair under a WSOP bracelet, but the hangover has been worse. The hangover refers to the fact that every morning I wake up thinking about hands from that final table. I even think about the first hand and things I couldn't control, the fact that my QT suited was calling the 3 bet of a player with KK if QJ doesn't 4 bet shove. The flop of QT5 would have likely seen me stack a player and take a dominating stack through. Poker doesn't always happen the way you want it to.

Nor should it.

I'm still teetering back and forth about calling off my chips with 0% chance of winning. Generally, you don't want to do that too often in a poker career. While I navigated my stack properly to the four handed game, I think I would have had an advantage keeping things in front of me and small. I hadn't tested one of the other four at the final table's post-flop game at all to that point in the tournament and with two player behind me, John Eames and Michael Tureniac that were clearly strong in that regard of the game, why not wait to get into more situations with Per Linde. Those are the strategic hangover thoughts. The truth is that I got up from the table and was so pissed off because I felt the championship was in my blood and my soul that tournament. It was an honest thought and one that still resides. I needed just a little more from myself. It could have been that one decision, maybe it wasn't, but in poker you can't know after you have no chips left.



The hangover extended to online play this week. I didn't bring my A game all the time. I wasn't as hungry as I needed to be. The standard winner's curse I've written about before followed me. I shouldn't have let it. Each day is a new day, a clean slate. Your record before that doesn't matter. All that matters is if you bring it or not. A week off may have been a good idea, but the hangover of such an exciting atmosphere made me want to create it again, even if it was for something smaller.

Oh well, I don't anticipate playing any tournaments Fri-Sat unless they are super duper turbos. I'll be celebrating St. Patty's Day in Chicago and hopefully not freezing my arse off looking at a green river. Happy St. Patty's Day and celebrate with your safety and others in mind.

EPT Copenhagen: So Close

"Fold or hang tough. Call or raise the bet. These are decisions you make at the table. Sometimes the odds are stacked so clear there's only one way to play it. Other times, like holding a small pair against two over cards, it's six to five, or even money, either way. Then it's all about feel, what's in your guts."

Mike McDermott from the movie Rounders

One of the best quotes from one of the best movies. It can't describe my tournament with anymore precision. Day 1 was jet lag day, but it worked. Get it in good and win. Control the pots. Day 2 was a struggle, card dead, but one last hour rush of aggression and nicely played hands kept me in contention. Day 3 was seize the moment, play with no fear, and enjoy every minute as we entered the money and set ourselves up for more. Day 4 was the craziest day of my poker life. It was the day of the biggest bluff I've ever pulled off. A bluff about feel, guts, your opponents, and knowing something would work. It did. It took me from 11th of 12 remaining players to in contention. A couple well timed hands later I was playing with one table remaining. The goal was so close. A major title against a talented field.

The final table was a struggle. It's always tough to win tournaments without flopping pairs and always having inferior holdings to opponents, but with the stroke of luck on the shortstack, my 44 beat 66 all in. I still had a shot. Then, I kissed my shot away with an incorrect read. See quote above. One critical mistake in my eyes over the course of 5 days. Not all that bad, but given my holdings today, I needed to be slightly better than that.

I can't help but smile when thinking about the last five days and how much fun I've had. I came up just short of a huge goal of mine, but recognize how much I've matured as a competitor.. I can smile because I never lost faith in knowing I'd win or in my own abilities. No matter what happened, I kept the game in front of me while always telling myself to pay attention to the 3-8 other opponents. I know I fought with my heart, my guts, and with every inch of poker talent I have. A taste of a major no limit live final table is intoxicating, but tournament players must always remember, the next time around, you all start with the same amount of chips. You start from scratch with your poker tools and your guts and of course, hopefully a little lady luck.

January Update, February Plans

January flew by in large part due to a 9 day trip to the Bahamas, the cleansing of my mind through a tougher yoga practice, and lots of poker in between. January really felt balanced. Let me first say that I really enjoy getting to meet my adversaries and friends at the poker table at the live tournaments. So often, we spend time looking at each other's screen names and competing online that we forget we are actually other living people. At least in competitive sports you could look another player in the eye all of the time. Playing online doesn't afford you that opportunity. I met some great people and had a blast despite playing two other events in the Bahamas and not cashing and an exact bubble (43rd place with 42 paying) in the 1k six max. I did, however, have an outstanding month online both in cash and tournaments. I was able to throw up the belt Aaron Rodgers style in my home by winning the 6 max $75 tournament on double guarantee multi-entry week and narrowly missed my first life ever title in a hyper turbo event during double guarantee week. In that tournament, I refused a chop for the 5th straight time and for the 5th straight time turned in a 2nd or 3rd place performance after refusing a chop. I don't think it's stubbornness, but when I get that deep in the tournament, I want to win it outright. Why play if you don't want to win the maximum? This works both ways in poker, but if the situation really calls for a deal, I'll make it. It usually doesn't.

I've had a lot of time to think about my goals for this upcoming year. My halfhearted approach towards the goals in the earlier blog is unlike me, but many of the goals that I haven't accomplished are the same from the year before. I will add a few things as I go along and think of them.

February is started with a great trip to see the family with two wonderful nieces having birthdays as well as my Grandma. Then the FTOPS begins on Full Tilt for what will prove to be two grueling weeks that should get me into a great poker mindset for the EPT Copenhagen at the end of February. Normally, I'd make my way out to LA for the LA Poker Classic, but the Commerce selfishly (against the poker community and spirit of the game) tried to get online poker legalized as a statewide initiative through California earlier this year. I think a one year break from there is fine enough for me on the boycott level. This initiative of casinos, states, and countries looking to restrict the access of local players to the same sites is anti-free trade and completely against the spirit of the game. If anything, the World Series of Poker has taught me that poker is an international game enjoyed by men and women from all over the world. It's equality in its purest form. States like New Jersey, countries like France, and poker rooms like the Commerce have all done or are in the process of restricting access to poker pools of money to their own states to make a profit. Now, I have no problem if the Commerce wants to compete in its own niche market, but everyone in the world needs to realize that the bigger the pie of players, the better for everyone, players, tax collectors, media, live casinos, etc.

PCA Update

Let's do a quick summary. I played the Main Event of the PCA Day 1a today and made it a meager 6 levels into the tournament before my short stack was busted when my KQ failed to improve against AJ. Two hands before dinner break, I flopped a straight with my 67 of clubs after calling a minimum raise of 800. After betting 2100 into 4 players, I was raised and subsequently called by AQ of spades after I put my pile of chips in the middle. With the board reading Ts 9s 8h, I stand as a slight 53%? favorite, so basically a coin flip for 35k in chips. The 2 of spades crippled my stack down to a paltry 6k from starting 30k.

Chips were not easy to accumulate today. The table was very tough relative to fields I've played in the past. I have a pretty good knack for being able to succeed in these tables in the past but today wasn't meant to be. I can pin two mistakes on myself, one where I just leveled myself into calling. This is when I begin to think he thinks I think he thinks I think he thinks when really he just has a hand better than mine. The other situation was typical of the table on a QQ4 board when I bet the button against two players and was check raised. I really needed to see through that, but I folded my TT here and another player paid the player $100 to see the hand. He showed 89.

That leaves 8 days in the Bahamas to figure out what I want to do with myself. I may enjoy the sun or go on water slides through shark tanks or whatever else people do on vacation. There are several mixed game side events that I would actually be excited to play, so I'll probably win one of those. I really want to get to the point where I have that killer instinct at a live poker table. Sometimes I begin to get chatty and see other players as humans and that affects my play. It's a leak and I'll get over it. All other players shall not be seen as friends while cards are being dealt. Poker is supposed to be a social game and what not, maybe it is. The problem with that idea though is that we are all chasing millions of dollars.